Jerk Off Encouragement (JOI) is a common kink!

JOI is the act of telling someone how to touch themselves. This is often done in written messages or through videos made for someone. It’s an incredible way to transfer control to someone else and engage in a different level of intimacy. But how do you engage in JOI? What can you say to give someone an incredible orgasm with your commands alone? In this article, I will give you my JOI tips and tricks. We will also get some sex education as to why JOI is so desireable!

Ask what they need first!

There is no need to train yourself to pleasure someone else if you have no idea what they are looking for! Whether this is your partner, a customer, or someone completely random – everyone has different desires. Having a conversation about what the outcome is will assist you during your learning. One person may want you to describe how you would give them a blowjob, whereas another may want you to describe them playing with your feet. If you don’t inquire, you will not know how to proceed!

Understand there are no creative boundaries in JOI

Before I give you some advice in JOI, there’s something important you need to know. There are NO boundaries in JOI. You can be dominant, or submissive. You can roleplay hundreds of scenarios or cater to thousands of kinks. The interests and limits discussed with yourself and the other party involved are all that matters. There’s no ‘right’ way to engage in JOI play, but there are ways to prepare and get more comfortable with it!

“During Jerkoff instruction, an instructor tells and sometimes shows a man how to masturbate. The instruction will usually tell men how hard or soft to jerk off, how rapid his strokes should be, and where he should touch. The instructor may also use a visual aid, like a dildo or vibrator, to demonstrate the right technique.” – Kinkly

JOI Tips and Tricks

1.) Be confident and in control –

Often people desire JOI because they don’t want to make decisions. They want to be told what to do and when to do it. This means you need to speak with confidence and instruct without asking many questions that require a lengthy answer.

2.) Tease and draw it out –

The buildup is one of the most desired parts of a JOI. When I come up with a JOI script or idea, I find myself turning to erotica. Read an erotic piece you enjoy and take note of the words used and how slow the scene progresses. Use these words and phrases to create your own lines. For instance: Squeeze your shaft and imagine it’s my mouth, slowly sucking you deep into the back of my throat. I slowly undress and approach you, licking and sucking your cock. You will now stroke harder as I lower myself onto you. Squeeze as I squeeze around you, urging your need to cum. Plunge your finger inside yourself and imagine it’s mine. My tongue is on your clitoris, licking and sucking as my fingers delve into you. These are just erotic scenes and pulled from erotic written works. But when you change some of the wording around and add in a ‘direction and description’ it becomes JOI! (Enjoy this video on How to Give Blowjobs, below! Or, scroll down for the rest of the JOI tips and tricks!)

3.) Wrap it up!

JOI is similar to dirty talking, as you are talking dirty. However, it’s up to you to direct the scene and that means it’s up to you to finish it. JOI scenes end in a variety of ways, but many enjoy a cum countdown. A cum countdown is where you direct them to orgasm and give them a numbered countdown to do so. I, personally enjoy adding actions to my countdowns to spice it up! For instance: Five – you begin to play faster, working your hand against your…. Four – you feel your orgasm rising and demanding to cum as you… And so forth. Be sure to be descriptive. Where do you want them to cum? What has the scene led to? By the last number you should be ready for them to orgasm, or ready to deny them the orgasm if you are doing an orgasm denial or edging theme. Either way, you are in charge and it’s based around the script you’ve made with the other party. JOI is a sensual and adventurous way to play. It’s widely searched and desired, providing an escape from worry and control when needed. Go along on your JOI adventure and instruct the masses to engage in blissful abandon! Check out this article about the Signs of Seduction!